Thanks and Thoughts

An overdue thank you to all that visited last and left sweet comments about our latest news.  We're still reeling from it.  We'd been trying so hard for so many years and just when we were resigned to not having another – well there it is…  don't get me wrong.  I'm looking forward to our latest family member making an appearance… but it's riddled with guilt of wishing it hadn't happened right now.
It's strange how much I neglect this blog… mostly because I doubt you would want to visit and read day after day the things that make me so sad and overwhelm me regularly.  I wouldn't.
I still haven't found any balance.  I feel stuck.  I'm pregnant, basically a single parent – Geo will be mega-commuting now for two years this July,  while my parents live here with us they're not able to really help as they struggle through their own trials and tribulations, and basically I'm bone tired of trying to figure out how we're going to get out of this house. 
The house… we finally had an honest answer from a very nice realtor in Clarkston.  He basically told us that we won't be able to get out of the house what we owe, advised us to save at least 10K, plant some mature trees, fence the yard, and then put it on the market at 190K… ouch.  It was good to hear though.  I was pretty certain that my husband didn't understand how bad it really was… he is, after all, an optimist.  I was happy to have a professional explain it clearly so that no one misunderstood what was going on.
So yes, we're stuck with this house.  We can't afford to rent it and we can't afford to walk away from it either… the economy is frightening, no jobs, no way for Geo to come back and start fresh.  His company was bought recently and they're going through some major changes, which to me means his job is no longer certain.  So much, so stressful, so hard to take in.
Yet, here I am… still plugging along.  Trying to find the magic in all of this… trying to find something we missed, something we haven't explored… trying to keep it together (not well mind you).  What a sad little life…


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